The Sentence: Do You Have One?

Peggy Noonan's column in Saturday's Wall Street Journal centered on a story Clare Booth Luce told about a conversation she had with President Kennedy in 1962. Noonan writes: "She told him...that 'a great man is one sentence.' His leadership can be so well summed up in a single sentence that you don't have to hear his name to know who's being talked about. 'He preserved the union and freed the slaves,' or, 'He lifted us out of a great depression and helped to win a World War.' You didn't have to be told 'Lincoln' or 'FDR.'"

Could you become so identified with the goal you are trying to achieve that upon hearing it everyone will know it's yours? What would it take to make that happen?

Let's really try and localize this concept for a second. Forget Lincoln, FDR, Kennedy and Obama. You may do something on that scale and that would be incredible. But let's keep it a little more down to earth for a moment: you're a leader in your organization, you are committed to learning, development and change and you are determined to have significant impact in your department, your company and/or your industry. What are you willing to do about it? And are you ready to be identified as "that leader," working on "that goal"?

For the last four years I've been urging the leaders (and aspiring leaders) in my company to determine the thing that matters most and make a plan to do it. Everything else is extraneous, a distraction, a nuisance at best and a hiding place from doing the real work at worst.

And, I've struggled with this as much as anybody. I've been vague, uncertain and downright fearful of stating my intention and clarifying my outcome. And why? Because if I say it someone actually might expect me to do it. What that doesn't factor in is that those same "someones" may also want to help me make it real. Go figure.

So, in the spirit of moving out of the darkness and into the light, here's my sentence: "He inspired leaders to be more fully human and to create organizations that unleash human potential."

What's yours?

Stretched by the Web

Last week I led a webinar, a live online learning event for leaders and those who help them lead. I spent one hour seated at my desk, staring into a tiny camera (one little green light urging me on) and sharing a story I love to tell. I talked about how we've attempted to build a culture of leadership and learning in my organization through the practice of coaching. How we aspire to inspire every employee to be fully engaged in their work. That the workplace can be a place where we realize our best selves - a place that stretches us to exceed our expectations and move closer to our dreams. If only leaders will lead.

As an exercise in communication, storytelling and presentation this was among the most challenging experiences of my career. I'm better for the stretch, and really gratified for the experience of it, but this was a damn hard thing to do. I expected it to be awkward to talk to "nobody," to have no physical audience, no people with whom to interact, banter, laugh and explore ideas. And it was. But the toughest part was sustaining energy for that much time with no feedback, only a few questions received through online chat to let me know I wasn't alone. But I did sustain it and I'm proud to say so.

Sitting here on the other side of it, I am thrilled to have shared the story and eager for the next opportunity to do so. I hope you'll check it out and pass it along.

http://businessleadernw.com/davidberry.html

Human Progress (?)

A stirring example of the speed of human progress – the technology view:

1903 Orville & Wilbur Wright stay aloft for 59 seconds

1927 Charles Lindbergh flies across the Atlantic in 34 hours

1969 Neil Armstrong walks on the moon

A stirring example of the speed of human progress – the developmental view:

50,000 years ago: the human search for meaning begins; males of the species find it difficult to admit being wrong

2,500 years ago: the human search for meaning continues; males of the species find it difficult to admit being wrong

Today: the human search for meaning continues; males of the species find it difficult to admit being wrong.

If we hide behind our work, our technology, our stuff, we surely forget where to find real meaning in our lives. Say "I'm sorry" today, forgive someone today, have a real conversation today. You won't regret it.

Beautiful Mess

Over the weekend my daughter took a big purple marker and left her signature on the book I've been reading. A book that I borrowed from a friend (sorry, Marlene!). I responded angrily and while I'm not proud of my response I'm really happy that I know why.

At some point in the last few years I learned to notice that my reactions to messiness are an indicator of my emotional "state of the union." When I overreact to something so predictable as a child writing in a book it tells me that I'm projecting some internal discomfort, some feeling of being out of control. It helps me to stop and take stock of what's going on inside that's not sitting well, the unprocessed or unfinished emotional business that I am not too excited to look at.

So, what is going on? The truth is that I've made a handful of commitments in the coming months that will stretch me in new ways as a professional. It is my anxiety about those events and the fantasies I've concocted about them that are unsettling. My rational mind knows that my preparation and my abilities "in the moment" will make them successful and enjoyable experiences but my emotional side isn't so easily satisfied. It wants to act out in pursuit of "perfect" (quite the opposite of messiness) and keep me focused on control.

When I overreact to mess; when I think perfect is possible; when I attempt to control the uncontrollable; that's when I know I need to slow down and notice the anxieties and uncertainties that are keeping me stuck. As I get better and better at trusting these markers I am able to move more quickly back to creativity, back to presence in the moment, back to being in flow, back to the beautiful mess.

Bella

Avery & Bella

I learned last week of the drowning death of one of my girl’s pre-school classmates and it has impacted me deeply. It has impacted all of us deeply. It is especially painful because of the innocence and the vulnerability. It is especially painful because our girls miss their friend. It is especially painful because every new loss forces us to confront the losses of the past and to anticipate the losses of the future. 

My only intention is to honor this brief but beautiful life. A life that intersected with the lives of my daughters in the simple playfulness only small children can share.  A life that touched me only briefly but, in death, has changed me forever. I am resolved when I say that I am determined to make something of this loss. My fears, insecurities and "playing small" feel so irrelevant in the shadow of a life cut short. I am more determined than ever to confront self-doubt. I am more determined than ever to not let my life go by without doing all I can to suck out the marrow. 

And what I know to be true so far is that it is desperately hard to do this. I need help - through accountability, challenge and encouragement. And, through the simple playfulness that only small children can share. I humbly ask for your help. I will return it to you as best as I'm able.

"A bruised reed He will not break. And a dimly burning wick He will not extinguish." Isaiah 42

Rest Stop or Cul-de-sac?

In a business environment and certainly in other venues as well, there is an obvious imperative that when we take time to focus on developmental activities the time has to be well spent. I wonder how often this is the case? I have long advocated the importance of taking "time out" to slow down, collect our thoughts and make a plan to move forward more purposefully and confidently than before. But, the "time out" is not enough. It's great to take it, but it has to be used well. The Orlando Magic orchestrated a perfect plan coming out of a timeout at the end of Game 2 (execution is a subject for another day). They worked on the right thing and it damn near worked.

The image I've been thinking about to illustrate this is the difference between a rest stop and cul-de-sac. The former is a place where you stretch your legs, make a pit-stop, think about your route - how far you've come, how far you have to go, when you'll need fuel, food, another break, etc. And, all in plain view of the road that is going to take you there. At a rest stop, we never lose sight of the action, the context, the flow - we just step out of it for a little while to get better prepared to re-enter in a new way.

A cul-de-sac is a dead end. It is anti-flow. It's a termination point typically arrived at after multiple changes in direction (wandering) away from a primary route. I don't know of too many cul-de-sacs from which you can still see the main artery. Of course, this is not universally bad, but in the context of professional development activities, it's a disaster. When we find ourselves in a developmental cul-de-sac it means we are colluding to separate ourselves from the larger question of how this specific work is connected to business needs. Of how my getting better is going to matter. The job of a good coach or facilitator is to allow enough wandering to feed the creative process but not so much that we just feel good and tell ourselves that it's productive.

What it really comes down to is the desire to change. If we have it, rest stops are obvious. We know we need them and we know that they are a means to an end, not an end in themselves. If we don't have the desire we are more likely to end up in cul-de-sacs, following clever routes of disconnection and denial, wondering if someone will show us the way but secretly hoping no one asks how we ended up in this part of town.